During my recent hospital rounds I met a lovely 84 year old patient. We hit it off right at the get go. Her list of medical problems were long, and chronic, we discussed all this and much more. There was a striking part of the conversation that I felt made a big difference for her care. I will share.
“ So tell me how are you feeling?”
“ angry. “ she paused. “ frustrated.”
“ At whom?” I asked.
“ My husband and God.” She replied looking away, with tears swelling in her eyes.
“ Please explain” I invited.
“ My husband died before me, and left me with all these things to do at the house, and my illnesses for me to deal with. I am angry at God because He refuses to let me die, so I can be with my husband.”
There it was. The source of her problems. Her mind and heart were not in-sync and so her body was failing, demonstrating this with disease and illness. She had lost hope.
I stayed silent for a bit, trying to find the right words when I knew that any words were not the answer, and would simply get in the way of her healing. I waited for a little longer.
How do you fix someone who is heart broken? Who feels that they have lost hope? Idea : Put the hope back into the conversation.
“ Perhaps you are facing these challenges for a reason?” I said, abruptly ending the awkward silence.
“ I keep asking for a sign and answers to my prayers, I do not get any.”
“ Are you listening keenly?”
“ I dont know what to listen for anymore.” She replied looking down at her hands.
“ Here is a suggestion if you care to take it. Breathe. Just breathe. Feel your heart beat in your chest. Let the pulse resonate all over you. When you are in tune with it, ask your questions and listen with your body, listen to your pulse for the response.” I offered.
“ I hope that helps” she said willingly.
That was it ! “ You can have all the hope you want, but do you have enough faith in the universe, and God to be here with you right now that is the key”
“ You see it’s about KNOWing that you are going to get better, heal up, get stronger, and be able to face the difficulties, and not worry about knowing after you faced the situation. The knowing has to occur before. That is the faith you seek. “
“ We each are invited to have the conviction and certainty before we see the results, it is only after that courage begins to play a role.”
She started crying. I had tears down my cheek. This for some reason was the exact prescription that she needed. So did I. In this moment we both were getting healed by a larger than life presence. A field of energy that is forever encompassing all life and matter in the universe. An intelligence of love.
Doctor and patient both surrendering in this instant for divine guidance and direction. She closed her eyes, as did I, as if to pray in the silence. To connect to the energy field that was beyond the grasp of our senses. We breathed in this space. Inhaling it like love, exhaling it like gratitude.
We looked at each other and smiled. There was nothing more to say. She thanked me, as I did to her for this opportunity to come back to the present and connect.
“ I am so glad you are my cardiologist” she said. “ You are spiritual and medical”
I laughed. “ sometimes, other times I am one or the other and neither”
I bid her farewell and promised to see her everyday.
We met daily during her hospital stay. It was comfortable, aligned. She seemed to have a new glow of faith around her. A new lease of healing. On her last day, she said “ I am finally getting out of here and I cannot thank you enough to bringing me back to my faith and hope back into my life. “
I held her hand for a moment as she with mine.
We each come into another’s life for unknown reasons, at least unknown to us. We exert an energetic imprint and then it is time to leave. I think at that moment, I needed her in my life more than she realized. Back on the path of trusting before moving forward, that is faith. That is surrender. That is love.
……….
I love you
