Funny story. The case of the missing beanie.
Was on call this past weekend. It is wintertime. I am bald. These facts are undisputed. I wore my beanie to keep my head toasty warm as I walked from the parking lot to the inside of the hospital wards. I got to an open workstation and plotted all my stuff down, phone, lunch-bag, coat, stethoscope, gloves and of course the beanie. Now 7 hours later, it was time to leave. I got myself and then proceeded to gather everything or so I thought.
I went about the rest of my day, with a nagging feeling that I was missing something. Finally it dawned on me. The beanie !! I hunted the car,my winter jacket and the house without avail. The following day I traced my steps from the parking lot to the hospital again, and all the way back up to the hospital wards. I got back to the same workstation that I had the day before. Plonked my stuff down, and there from the corner of my eye on the floor was my beanie !! It must have fallen as I was gathering my things. I picked up my prized hat and took a deep breath. There was a lesson in all of this. In between my breaths I found it. And here it is.
So often we go through our lives constantly in search of something. We hunt, we plead, we pray, we rush to find that we believe is missing.
We get frustrated, angry, and create doubts and judgments that lead to fears. We feel lost and hurt, wounded that we are missing things, people, relationships, and in the end we feel we are missing parts of ourselves. Yet in an abundant universe that creates worlds and unravels galaxies how can there be anything that is missing or in a state of lack. Nothing is ever missing. Not even misplaced. We just cannot see things when we look with our minds.
It is when we start to look at life through our hearts and not with our eyes that we find what we look for. When we intently search, we inadvertently become that separation. When we just be present we connect to the being of all things, the unison, the oneness. Love is something we all keep searching for like it is outside of us, or in someone else. What if it was not anywhere but inside of us, a living breathing force of nature, in abundance. It was exactly where we left it, inside us, next to us, all around us. It is our separation through the mind that made us forget and make us search.
Like my beanie, which was exactly where I left it, perhaps it is time to look for love exactly where I left it. In my heart.
………………
I love you
