We usually like to share the best part of ourselves online. The exciting, the joyous and the happy. Yet not everything is always at its peak. Such is the nature of life in the forms of peaks and troughs. Every rise must have a fall. I faced that recently. While driving with my family to the restaurant to celebrate our 21st wedding anniversary a day ago, an unexpected event occurred.
A car accident. Here is the narrative and the lessons that emerged.
With the love of my life at my side and my offspring in the back, we were heading to a delightful restaurant to meet up with my parents. Peak traffic time of course. I checked my mirrors and changed lanes. All fine. I was going to get off the exit I 84 West and there was chockablock cars in the off ramp lane. I saw a huge space ahead of me in between a tractor trailer and another car an almost 4 car length space. I signaled and took the opportunity and got into lane behind the trailer. Just then BOOM BANG, the car behind me slammed into me. We were all shocked as we we jolted forward. I could feel the back end of my car had taken quite the beating.
Dazed for a second I regained my senses and planned to move to the hard shoulder per traffic etiquette to get out of the main traffic barrage, expecting the guy who hit me to do the same. He did not. He turned left and sped off back into the highway. I did not catch the license plate as there was none. There was a faint sighting of a plate in his rear windshield. With loud banging noises in the back of the car we limped off the exit and found an empty deserted parking lot to stop, get out, regroup and inspect the damage. We spoke to 911 emergency dispatcher who informed us that another car in traffic had noted the plates and unfortunately they were fake. So this is what a hit and run felt like. He clearly must not have been paying attention as he was accelerating in a cue. The police came, took our statements and the process of eventually getting this heart wrenching damage to my car and my very bruised ego, to get fixed. That was it in a nut shell. We managed to get home again and were in gratitude that we were all alive, healthy and well.
Yet no narrative is complete without learnings. Here is what I was able to unpack through my emotions and feelings.
1 Adversity comes in all forms. It is how we rise to them that matters most.
2 It is important to seize opportunities. Sometimes there will be failures in the process, but that does not mean that I never change lanes again if I see an opening. The same with experiences in other areas of life.
3 We will always find support when it is needed. The universe will provide us and not leave us stranded ( unless that is a lesson to go through as well.) The police and my parents were very supportive after this occurred.
4 I am a great believer in being open to the signs the universe has for us as it tries to communicate with each of us in every moment. I had asked the universe for a sign since I was feeling stuck in a certain area of my life. I asked for guidance. I got it. The whack of my car, specifically in the rear, was none other that the cosmos giving me a figurative kick to my rear end, saying MOVE FORWARD, stop playing small and safe. Message heard loud and clear. No more living in my comfort zone, time to step out and shine.
5 Gratitude for health. We were safe and uninjured. That is all that counts. Cars can be replaced. But the body cannot.
6 When we lose possessions it means nothing. We can lose money, it means nothing. When we lose our health or our character, it is everything.
7 Pride and fall. If I was prideful that I skillfully was able to navigate and weave into a traffic spot, I was humbled just as quickly.
8 SLOW down. Life for me begins at 200mph every day. I probably dream at high speed too. Not ok. Slow down.
9 Patience. From what I gather the process of car body repair, and insurance can be lengthy. Be patient with each step.
10 My son asked me. “ Dad why are you not freaking out?” I surprised myself by being very calm and non reactive. Perhaps a little in shock, but I responded to the situation and did not scream or panic. The lesson was that I have the ability to stay calm and posed in the face of trauma, and in this observational state see all my options and then respond.
11 Things happen quickly in life. My grand plans for the evening took an unexpected turn. Unexpected. Life is not scripted. It is wise to prepare for the worst, but be resilient to the unknown.
12 Love those you care about fiercely, anything is possible.
I have an unsettled gratitude for this experience. Not sure why? Maybe now that I am growing up ( in light of recent birthday) I have a deeper level of wisdom that is being revealed to me as I see the hidden order of the universe with greater clarity. Or perhaps not. Time will tell.
PS There are others also on the highway of life on this spaceship of earth that we share the roads with. So try not to be an idiot, because everyone is just trying to get from A to Z without upsetting the alphabet.
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I love you
